Sunday, April 1, 2012

Sugar and Spice and Everything Kooky: You Are a Kook If: Series

Sugar, of course, is a NATURAL substance (sugar cane, beet sugar, etc.). It has been around forever. It has been part of human diet essentailly forever. Further,t the human BODDY essentially burns SUGAR (glucose) as the fuel upon which it operates (like a car rns on gasoline). Oh, this is not exactly the sugar that oiu eat in food (or put on food), bkut it is not that different. What the body does is CONVERT the food that we eat, or its own fat, to glucose, and then BURN it (a bil=ological, CARBN BASED, ENGINE that contributes directlyl to "global warming", releasing C(2 into the atmosphere--lol, as my brother and I used to joke about legislation to curb "greenhouse gases" like CO2, such as requiring everyone tto breather only on alternate days).


We are now faced with a "movement" to do something about as CRAZY (I mean this literally) as reqkuiring us to breather on alternate dalys; a "movement" to REGULATE sugar like COCAINE or HEROIN. As a society, we are stadily going stark, raving mad, and this blog's "you are a kook if:" series cannot keep up. Yep. CBS has been PROMOTING a "Sixty Minutes" prrmam this Sunday asserting this propoisition that sugar is a TOXIN, which basically needs to be eliminated from our diet. Now "toxin" is a ord of ART, rather than a word with an objective meaning. Yoiu KNOW this is DISHONEST (as you already knew CBS was dishonest), when the BUZZ word,m "toxin" is used. The whole idea here is to TAKE AWAY YOUR FREEDOM by MFORCING LYOU to give up things like Cokes (all that makes life worth living for me). It is not too much to say that that our MEDIA, and other leftists, would prefer to BAN SUGAR, and legaliize COCAINE, and even HEROIN. There is not even any doubt that they have this position on MARIJUANA. If I had to chose, as I don't, I would go the other way: Not interferee with EITHER SUGAR or COCAINE. The only reason I come down on thte side of making RECREATINAL, mnd-altering drugs illegal is that I don't think our COIETY can afford amkking allo fthese RECREATIONAL drugs legal (and all new ones that are developed). I do NOT favor cocaine being illegal because it is a TOXIN (lol). This is one of the reasons I call myseelf a "conservative", and not a liberatarian (making drugs like cocaine illegal), although you cans see how CLOSE I am to being a libertarian when you realize that I would VOTE FOR RON PAUL for President against Barack Obama. That is something I will NOT do with regard to Mitt Romney.


This is all about the FOOD POLICE: the same peple wo want to tell McDonald's what to sell and make FAT illegal (maybe even fat people, if they entirely got their way). SALT, of course, is definitely a TOXIN (notice how it DESTROYS CARS in the north). Is it TOXIC to climb Mt. Egverest? Damn right it is. This is all about FREEDOM, and the people who really want to TAKE FREEDOM AWAY FROM US. Enough,. You shouuld not need convincing on this one.


You ARE a kook if:


191. Yuo say sugar is a toxin, as if it means something.


192. You are "Sixty Minues", although this may be a redundancy. I know that this blog INTENEDED to label the people of Sixty Minutes KOOKS when they asked Mitt Romney whether hhe had engaged in premarital sex with hhis wife. Leet us face it: the people of Sixty Minutes are INDUSTRIAL GRADE KOOKS: waqht I call irredeemable kooks who cannot be "saved" by giving Penance" (such as 500 "Hail Marys", or whatever).


193. You want to either REGULATE or BAN SUGAR, or things with sugar int hem (like sugary soft drinks). There should be a separate category for EILL KOOKS (as distinguhsed from kooks like me, who merely want women to not have the vote). Therese people want to dESTROY FREEDOM, and I have nothing but contepmt for them all. No, I don't carre if peple want to conduct a VOLUNTARY campaign against SUGAR. Sure, they would still be KOOKS. But I could simply ignore them, other than mentioning them in my ongoing series (as I have done with PETA--althugh PETA regularly goes over the line into EVIL KOOKDOM).


This campaign agasinst sugar is absurd. Did you know that tit is BAD for you to eat TOO MUCH sugar? Of course you did. I know that at the age of eight. My motehr told me--probably much earlier than that. So did your mother tell you (most likely, anyway). This idea that you need a campaign to DESTROY FREEDOM to make people do 'healthy" things (like not climb Mt. Everest) is EVIL, and it is STUPID. Above all, it is ABSURD.


You kooks out there have EARNED this one. You have even earned this blog's "Flying, Fickle Finger of Fate" award for monumental crimes against reason (this blog's reincarnation of the onld "Laugh In" award, with Dick Martin presenting the statuette of THE FINGER --index finger--to the award winners).


P.S. No proofreading or sepll checkng (bad eyesight). Oh, you may have noticed that I hve SKIPEED a few numbers. That is because I feel that I have REPEATED a few numbers in the recent past. There is no real record kept of what number I am on (I don't care). Thie numbers are only to give you an idea of just how many KOOKY things this blog has felt it necessary to highlight. Like the government's employment numbers, yu shuld not take these numbers as exact and concrete. They are onlyl a fallible ESTIMATE of how far along this blog is in the 'you are a kook if:" series.

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